Friday 5 September 2014

Five Sentence Fiction - Darkness

This weeks Five Sentence Fiction photo was striking and couldn't be missed. Interestingly I couldn't help but give an edge of hope to it too. Enjoy.

She tried to push against it but it was all around her, tugging at her clothes and messing with her hair.

It wrapped around her, rife with nasty voices telling her all the things that would break her and sink into the depths of her aching soul, widening the gap that resided there.

She wanted to scream, she wanted to bawl, she wanted to rage against it, and shake her fists, and yell at the top of her lungs that it wasn’t fair, that she was still here, and she wouldn’t let it consume her.

But the voices only grew louder, crowding in her head, picking apart her sanity.

Then she saw it; a shaft of light breaking through the darkness and she leapt for it with every ounce of her being, allowing it to fill her up and soothe her noisy mind, if only for a time. 


  1. This is a wonderful Flash Fiction - in 5 sentences --- the sense of despondency and anxiety is well conveyed.

    A small note: perhaps typographical - the last paragraph --- it should be written "leapt" (past tense) or "leaped" active tense.

    1. Thanks for the heads-up, I will change to leapt... although it seems this word, along with 'spelt' and 'learnt' are no longer acceptable these days, thanks to internet spell check (ie. Microsoft) - it's marking them incorrect as I type.

  2. Beautiful, Miranda. Love your use of the prompt.

  3. I've missed you 5sf, this is lovely.

  4. Wonderfully expressed the situation of a dark and disturbed mind.

  5. Thanks all for your lovely comments!